Have you ever been asked to describe yourself in one word?
It’s a tough task. That question was posed this morning at S.K.I.N. and it took me most of the morning to figure it out. My conclusion was not one I expected.
Skeptical.
Maybe that’s not the right word. It’s not that I don’t believe in God’s Sovereignty and provision in my life. It’s not that I don’t trust Him or the people around me. It’s not that I think I will fail in life.
It’s more about a lack of understanding.
I don’t understand the omnipotence of God. I don’t understand how He loves me so much that He provides my every need when I don’t deserve it. I don’t understand why He and others continue to keep their promises when I don’t. I don’t understand why I am blessed as much as I am with an amazing family, great friends, and a steady job.
I understand that all of that is true. I want to understand more, but it is so far beyond my comprehension that instead of just being in awe, I become skeptical.
God, please bring me back to a place of awestruck wonder and out of this place of skeptical mis-guidance.